old news...

I had lunch with an old friend today...It was so refreshing to be social that I didn't want it to end...I have been in a funk...Not the sort of funk that keeps me from leaving the house...but the kind that keeps me awake at night...avoiding productivity around the house, avoiding the nurturing of creativity with the boys...It is a funk for sure!!!

I am just so alone...and at times I love that I am usually so happy as this isolated woman and mother here in these burbs...But some times it gets the best of me and I slip into this state with out the conscious decision to ignore it even...the realization and acceptance comes only after I have been here for days, sometimes weeks...Maybe my own denial...but non the less precious time is wasting...

Time to be the mother that I am so striving to be...time to keep my home a sanctuary of some sort...time to manifest my dreams...time to be present and grateful for all that I have and what I am trying to do by it!!!

No more belated February funk...I am coming alive again as is the spring...and I am going to be in full bloom before you know it...full bloom for this season that is...Gotta start some where...after all...

Every masterpiece was once a work in progress!!!

Mother Loaded!

Mambo Sprouts...Another Eco-Mama 101 Lesson!!!

I don't know about how you ladies are doing during this economic down turn...But I do know that it can sure burst your small carbon foot print, "green", organic, earthy Mama bubble...And easily at that! We are just trying to do all we can to stay green and sustain our healthly organic appetites...and I have come real close to stoking up on some Hamburger Helper and Ramen Noodles...Okay I'm not quite that desperate yet, but I have altered my grocery list a bit and my technique too! I just thought I would share a few things with you that I think are really awesome...

I love Whole Foods...and it's a lustful and life long kind of love! I love everything about it...The experience of shopping there full of pride about all the additive free and nutritiously rich, from the earth foods for my family...The feeling of doing my part when i check out with my reusable green bags (with out having to tell the checkout lady be to not put my items in a plastic bag before putting them into my reusable bags...That seriously happened to me once at another store, and it wasn't that long ago either)... So needless to say my heart has been a little broken as our budget as gotten tighter and I have had to enjoy my grocery shopping a little less and to find ways to save a little more...all while trying to not sacrifice are more green lifestyle!!!

And so here is what I did...I went to three different groceries and I compared all of my organic items and what they cost...I was shocked to find out that most of my items, same brand even, cost less at Kroger than they do at Whole Foods..Yep you heard it ladies...cheaper organics at Kroger...There isn't as big of a variety, but the basics are there and cost us less. So now I go to Whole Foods once a month or so and stock up and indulge in the few things that I miss on a regular basis, and the rest of the time I take so much pride in how great we can eat now at regular old Kroger!..

The icing on the cake is that I discovered that you can apply online for the coupon book that they carry at Whole Foods...and Kroger has lots of those items too...It comes directly to my mailbox and get this...it is even in the form of a little book, so no cutting needed!!!

Here's the link so you can get it in your mailbox too, oh and there are printable coupons as well...Happy Organic shopping!!!

http://www.mambosprouts.com/

Mother Loaded!!!

P.S. My new favorite organic find is this "no stir"peanut butter...Look for the one that says "no stir" on the bottle...It is awesome and never needs a stir before it's ready to be spread!!!

My MLK...Mercury in Retro Grade...

Well...You know those days where you were really just better off fulfilling your DH's vision of you on the couch watching the tube and eating bonbons all day...Yeah well that was this day for me...

Actually it has kind of been the last few weeks in general...It all started a few weeks back when I finally...at 25...decided to take responsibility for my dental health...Yes, horrible I know...but I did have the perfect excuse of two aunts in the dental field and one who was sweet enough to be (the not too regular) keeper of my teeth...So I was overdue to actually go to the dentist instead of meeting my Aunt after hours to get a quick cleaning and xrays...

I was a little nervous but also fully expecting the few cavities that I have been ignoring for the past year...It was a pleasant experience until I cried when this dentist came in and said that he was going to need to fill 14...Yes people I said 14...teeth, and He then proceeded to give me the full plan including costs...totaling around $4,000...

That was enough for a week, for sure...and so for MLK I was determined to be productive...I made an appointment to get a second opinion to go against that greedy bastard of a dentist...And thank God that it worked...Even though I was late for my appointment and got a speeding ticket on the way there from an officer that looked like he was 12 years old...literally

I chose to focus on my positive second opinion of 4 fillings rather than that of my damn ticket and to continue to try and make the most of this free day...So I proceeded to get the kids after my appointment and to have my Mom pick us up after taking my car in for a little overdue attention...It was going to be an hour so I packed up the kids in my Mom's car to kill some time running errands...And thats when it happened...

We were leaving toys r us and there wasn't a car or anything else in sight...I looked back to referee the kids in there sharing match...and BOOOM!!! Smack literally...smack in the center with my moms car...Into a light post...I still can not understand how, in a completely empty lot how I managed to hit this thing and so dead on too...

the next day...My boss told me that one of her schedule was changing and so thats that...I lost my job...

YEP...mercury is in retrograde...or for those of you not into astrology...MY last few weeks were full of unexpected suckyness(just life I guess really)!!! I will assure you though that I am on the up and up and things are a shifting and I am having faith and very easy at that...I know it could be alot worse...I am blessed!!!

Now I Lay Me Down.......

Okay so I do have a few plans for some future post but this just touched me and had to be written tonight...just a little something...

Scout had Cub Scouts tonight and so Pip and I had the night (bedtime) to our selves and I do usually try to take a little extra joy from those moments....So I crawled into his bunk bed instead of kneeling on the floor and snuggled and chatted for a while after our story...When we have these moments I usually repeat a few things that I consciously try to say every once in a while to both of my boys...Like, how grateful and happy I am that God gave me the important and special job of being their Mom...about how special we are to have Mother Lili as our guardian angel and how special it is for my boys to have two Mom's...etc...

(FYI...DH just mentioned tonight that people at the school could think I was a lesbian with all that "i have two moms" talk...when he noticed that it was stated for all to wonder on Scouts star student poster...thought that was pretty funny and worth sharing!!!!)

Back to tonight...Then we reminisced about past birthdays and about when we met and then something I am really proud of encouraging...Pip said prayers for us...

It is so easy to get into the habit of saying the same old same old prayer every night...and so I have always added my own little something at the end and lately I have encouraged the boys to say prayers for us instead of listening to me...Scout is still a little reserved about adding to the usual, but Pip no way...He couldn't be reserved if he wanted to be, at this point at least...

I had a moment tonight during his prayer...cried even...over loaded with love and gratitude about how lucky I am to have such special sweet boys as my own...I need these moments every once in a while...amongst the usual repeating of my self and such!!!

It's not word for word...because it is too hard for me to remember...but pretty much and in a nut shell...this is what he said...melts your heart...I know....

"now I lay me down to sleep pray the lord my soul to keep...If I should die before I wake, pray the lord my soul to take...the angels...I mean if I should live another day guide my way...angels watch me through the night, guide me to the morning light.........................................................................................

and please let nothing bad happen...be with people who don't know you...and all the people who have cancer...please don't let anyone die in the whole universe...and don't let any one die in Iraq...and don't let any ones house get bombed...and be with mister kitty and any cats who got thrown out for being bad...don't let him be being bad down stairs right now and be being in Dad's office...and be with uncle Matt...and don't let anything happen bad in the whole universe.................Amen"

I mean seriously...it doesn't get much cuter than that...and this comes from that son who was in trouble last weekend for whipping it out in his room and peeing in the corner on the carpet...and then not telling anyone until Scout happened to kneel in it later in the day!!!

Gratefully,

Mother Loaded

P.S. Pip's room is literally two steps, one in a half maybe, from his bathroom!!!!!!!!!

JeJu: Home of Well Being!!!!!!!! Part Two

If you didn't realize that this post is titled as part two and you stumbled upon it with out reading it's partner (that likes to go first), then please check out part one of JeJu here...or read on with out it if you must...


You see I am a free spirit and all and most of my closest friends (family really) are free spirited and cultured beings as well!!! So it was no shocker to have been exposed to Jeju from my friend Gurudarshan or that it would be all traditional and full of nakedness, but still I was a little funny about it! I guess maybe I have a pinch of modesty...not in all circumstances but in semi public places Yes yes I do...


Despite that small challenge...actually partially because of it...My first Korean Spa experience was awesome!!! It wasn't all nakedness, just a bit...and even though I felt like an insecure rebelling teenager for a second as I undressed in the locker room and saw the hand sized towels that they provide for you to use...As I knew it would, it felt good to challenge my inhibitions and to let go of any and all of my womanly insecurities and to be proud as I walked this naked ass through the locker room and into the hot tub...It was liberating and just added to the experience!!!


It was relaxing and oh so fun too!!! After checking out the hot tub and refusing to stick more than a toe in the cold plunge tub...we checked out the hottest sauna I have ever been in in my life (seriously the salt or something else in that herb mix was so intense in there that my nostrils were almost burning)...we then dressed in our provided pink t shirts and long shorts to venture into the common area of the spa...


It was incredible...there were around 7 different saunas to experience and each one was filled with different properties to surround you with and to provide different benefits ...Three of them were these huge free standing beautiful domes in the center of the common room and they were probably my favorite...One was entirely built and covered with natural salt bricks, said to strengthen your cardiovascular system, increase blood circulation, flush out impurities, and release dead skin cells...The next surrounded with semi precious stones and crystals had a huge(and I mean gynormous) star made of amethest on the ceiling...It was so beautiful in there without a single spot that wasn't covered in crystals...and the other dome was all silver and gold, known to have a positive effect on nerve stability!!! I mean how cool is that!!!


Then aside from the domes are a few other saunas on the side...one filled with Korean baked clay to bring relief to your tight muscles(if you have those) and to flush out impurities for refreshed skin...One with toxin absorbing charcoal and another with jade to increase metabolism, improve circulation, and relieve arthritis pain!!! Oh, and the rock ice room to cool you down too!!!


Now some of you may not choose to believe in the healing properties of these natural elements...But lets face it people wether you wanna believe in it or not, it's cool to think about and just as relaxing to experience....I don't know how much these properties played into my overall state of bliss when I left but personally I don't care...

The combination of all these, along with much needed time for my self...a day spent with cultured women...and the traditional public korean bath that I took on a stool and along side others...WORKED...I felt great when I left...relaxed, replenished, and rejuvinated!!!
So, I will certainly go back again and I might even let one of those korean ladies give me a body scrub or a "hip bath" next time too!!!

What's a "hip bath" you say??? Oh yes ladies you can have your hooohaaa treated there too...while you sit on a seatless stool and traditional korean herbs are steamed up your lady junk!!!!!! Said to help balance yeast and all sorts of other stuff that I can't remember...I am determined to do a little more research on this particular tradition, so I'll keep you posted on what I find out...And on second thought what other kinds of spas do we have in the Atlanta area?..Cause I wanna know!!!!!!!!

Sincerely,
A more cultured and relaxed ML

JeJu: Home of Well Being??????????? Part One

It's a New Year and so there for...as many of you have probably been doing as well...I have been making lots of new goals and adding lots of new things to my to do list!!! It has almost been a constant state of mind this week! My method is to use this time of year as an over all time for reflection of my self...I make some short term goals that I hold important, but I also broaden the spectrum a bit...I figure the wider the path the easier it is to stay on the straight and narrow...If I have a handful of resolutions then I am bound to succeed at atleast one of them...or so I hope!!!

This year I have been reflecting and resolving on a lot of typical ones like to drink tons more water...exercize more and eat better...to take more time to do things for my self...to be a better morning person...and a better mom!!! And then there is my goal to be less moody and more forgiving with DH...and to be a more generous lover (including touching the man parts a little more often)...I have of coarse not clued DH in on these last few and probably won't as too not set any one up for dissapointment!!! Who needs extra pressure, Right?!!

And the list continues with blogging more consistantly...creating more opportunities to spend date time with DH (even if it's at home)...Doing more fun and creative things as a family...adding more culture to our lives!!!...To send my letter to Oprah and Nate for my dream home makeover...to spend more time with women ( I am in need of a few ladies nights)...and not to be forgotten either is to make room for spontaneity in my life and to challenge my self each and every day...there will probably be a few more added to the list before this day is over and as the year continues...

See what I mean...If all of these are officially declared as my resolutions for 2009 then even if I were to only attept some of them I would have made a great effort...Not that this is my way of thinking and that I am trying to get around good ole fashion worK!!! I am ready for the work and am committed to following through with a good chunk of this, but I am not giving my self a limited opportunity for success and I am having a realistic, already overloaded mother's mentality about it all!!! I recommend that you do the same too...it really works!

So I was happy to be well on my way in only one day when an opportunity arose on Wednesday night, spontaniously (I might add)...I was hanging out with my friend insomnia (oh look that's another one right now already...to break up with my other lover insomnia)...When I got a hello on google chat from my cool and enlightened friend Gurudarshan...She's in town still from the holidays and I had just had my prior plans for the next day canceled and so I asked if she wanted to make that trip to the korean spa that she had told me about once!!! she called our other friend whom she had previously made plans with and there you go...

I was off the like an early bird the next morning, very spontaniously, to spend time with some important ladies in my life...to experience a little culture...to do some thing for my self for a change...and I challenged my self a little too!!! I am Wellllll on my way!!!

TO BE CONTINUED...................

A JERRY SPRINGER CHRISTMAS!!! Ho Ho Ho

There weren't really Ho's though, but seriously...It really was the strangest holiday that I have experienced thus far...I am a nut for this time of year and I really enjoy it with faith like a child...But this year it just wasn't in the cards...I was so happy for it to all be over!!!

It all started with my scrooge of a DH and snow balled from there...He was pisst for weeks that we were expected to do the CRAZY Christmas shuffle...That so many of you probably know all too well...I understand where he's coming from, really I do, but there just isn't a solution or alternative...With divorce running deep in both sides of this family we are destined to spread our selves thin this time of year!!!

So I tried to muster up enough positivity for all of us to carry us through...Oh and did i mention that the Monday before Christmas we went to the pediatrician and came home with strep throat for Scout and bronchitis and an ear infection for Pip!!! So I Thanked God that we had just enough time to get the antibiotics in our system, allowing us to not spread a little extra something along with our Christmas gifts!!!

We headed out for the first of our stops on Christmas Eve around 10am...fully prepared with snacks, water, and Pips inhaler for a long winters trip...Literally, as we were walking out to the truck Scout started to cough for about the first time since he had been sick...and I SWEAR to you that the child coughed every 5-10 seconds for the entire hour and half drive...Poor kid, I almost was mad at him it was so annoying...I have never been so happy to get out of a car in my life...and DH was eager to jump to the conclusion that he and Scout would probably need to go home and skip my family's party later that day!!! Big Shocker there, but I was so distraught from the constant 12 hacks a minute Christmas carol that I literally didn't care all that much!!! We ate, drank, and ripped through the wrapping, were spoiled with too much material wealth as usual, picked a lazer leveler kit in the exchange?, and managed to meet a new addition to the family (through a pregnancy-free shot gun wedding a few months back)...and that about sums it up!!!

Five hours after arriving, we were running late getting all our new loot loaded up and in the car for round two or our adventure...Thank God Scout had recovered enough to not miss out on the fun...We pulled up only about an hour and a half late to see one of my Aunts in a tissy with my Oma(German Grandma) in the cold-e-sac, and when I say "tissy" I mean she was enraged in a way that I have never seen her before...Turns out being late might have been a blessing in disguise because we missed the climactic 
ending beginning of the drama!!!

You see this was my Dad's first sober Christmas and we are all so proud of him and made the choice to show our respect by having a dry Christmas Eve...I guess my "lost" younger sister and her loser boyfriend didn't get the memo!!!  So, needless to say Auntie had some legitimate reasons for her rage...From what I gathered there were some words on the subject and it escalated from there!!! Well Auntie, with the kids in the car already, was off with out even a hello or a gift exchanged!!! I thought that it couldn't possibly get worse and...BOY was I wrong!!!

The drama continued from there and included the following...an awkward sober Dad feeling at the center of the drama..."lost" sister and loser boyfriend continuing to drink and make them selves at home with all uncle's beers...Opa (German Grandpa) has a kumbaya with loser boyfriend about showing respect...Loser, idiot boyfriend doesn't have a F***ING clue and continues to get intoxicated...Opa and Oma catch loser boyfriend grabbing a handful out of the fruit bowl and shoveling it down his throat and then with the entire ham hock in his hands while taking a bite...NO JOKE this really happened...as my good friend Iris always says, I couldn't make this shit up!!! Weird Weird Weird...and totally Jerry Springer...All we lacked was the trashy dirty slut of an ex-girlfriend!!! Thank God for that!!!

So then to top it all off, as if that weren't enough for a trashy TV version of a Christmas Eve...Right before we left, our sweet little cousin threw up every where and continued to do so for the next three days, exposing us to the stomach bug!!!

All in all the positive side was that all that drama made me extra grateful for our first Christmas spending the night at our new house and alone!!! I was so much more happy about the idea of getting up on Christmas morning and spending some intimate, drama-free time together as a family...

AND then about 45 minutes after waking the door bell rings and the saga continues...Grandpa got confused and thought he was expected on Christmas day when in fact we had invited him over for the 26th...

Whatever, at this point...WHAT THE F#^*@ EVER...

Took him with us to my Mom's for the day and then apologized when Grandma got to our house later that evening to find her unexpected ex-husband here as well...You win some and you lose some...

Hope your Christmas was more laid back than mine and if not...then take comfort in the fact that you are not alone...Better luck next year...It couldn't possibly be worse, Right???

Happy New Year to you all!!!!!

Gratefully,

ML (Mother*Loaded)

I'm Baaaaaaacccccckkk...with a Crazy Animal Update Too!!!

Well It has been a month and a crazy one at that...So here's an update for you and a vow of my return!!! Will follow with a juicy Christmas post tomorrow!!!

* OUT WITH THE OLD AND IN WITH THE NEW* At least when it comes to the pets in this house...It was expected when our Old Man Shadow Dog took his last walk about with no return...and then just so sudden and sad when we came home just weeks later to find that our sweet sweet China Cat had lost in a collision with a truck right in front of our drive way...Ironic and I think not just a coincidence that they left together really...They were good friends and we were grateful to have had them as a part of our family...They certainly won't be forgotten!!!

And so the story begins for a new addition to our family..."Mister" Kitty is his name and flea breeding his is game(the boys made that one up)... He is a pretty cute, crazy loved new member of our tribe!!!  It was totally fated that he came into our lives and because we loved our China so, there just isn't much hope for this kitty witty to not be just completely rotten!!! He has big paws to fill though!!! So, with no further ado I give you "Mister" kitty's Mother*Loaded debut...

Isn't he cute?!!!